Idiot

-Noun

1. an utterly foolish or senseless person

2. Psychology. a person of the lowest order in a former classification of mental retardation, having a mental age of less than three years old and an intelligence quotient under 25

3. Me, today. 

So I was an hour and a half late for work today. And then I just generally sucked at life. It was not fun. 

For my wife,

Explanation: I was told I looked pretty last night and it embarrassed me. I don't know why. 

I saw a license plate today that said    P MINER

I wonder what P he is mining...endless possibilities.